Bolton (1986) argues that while one of the primary tasks of the listener is to stay out of the other’s way so that the listener can discover how the speaker views his situation, this aim is often frustrated because the ‘listener’ interrupts and diverts the speaker by asking too many questions or making too many statements. All too often listeners do too much of the talking. The listener can encourage the speaker to talk, can better concentrate on the task of listening and can gently seek out more information to help promote a better understanding of the speaker’s message by using door openers, minimal prompts, accents, statements, questions, attentive silences and a number of special concentration techniques.
Door openers Careful attention to non-verbal clues can often signal when somebody is pre-occupied or worried and may want to talk. In these circumstances the listener might be able to help the other by offering what Bolton (1986) describes as a noncoercive invitation to talk; this might be either an invitation to begin a conversation or an encouragement to continue if the speaker shows signs that he is unsure about saying more.
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